Greetings from the belly of the beast.

My name is Eve. I write about politics, sociology, metaphysics, and African diasporic spirituality. I am a Black Haitian lesbian inspired by the revolutionary works of Audre Lorde, Octavia Butler, Frantz Fanon, Zora Neale Hurston, Alice Coltrane, June Tyson, and so on. I am opening this Substack because I desire an outlet in these perilous, perilous times. I feel the need to share, and hopefully find those who resonate with my words.

This space is for me, primarily. And anyone who authentically cares for liberation and truth, not obfuscated by white supremacist cis-hetero capitalist ableist patriarchy. The wordiness is necessary! I consider myself a perpetual student who is humbly critical. I tolerate no bullshit, deception, oppressive propaganda, lazy thinking, ecetera. So I may be blunt. Just know all of my anger and frustration is rooted in love for liberation.

My ancestral veneration journey started in 2020. When my father passed in 2017, I sought spiritual comfort away from the suffocatingly homophobic Christianity I was raised in. I started with new-age manifestation techniques as many young (and naive) spiritualists do. In 2020, I lost two classmates to suicide only months apart — and this was prior to the COVID-19 pandemic beginning! As someone who had been dealing with suicidal ideation from a young age, I was plunged into both grief and unhealthy admiration for their bravery to end their suffering.

One night, with my mind full of burden and anguish, I inexplicably felt a warm maternal presence surrounding me. A universal presence which felt like pure, pure love. I did not recognize this as my Ancestors, Lwa, or Maman La Vie at first. I had no knowledge of it. I just knew there was a presence beyond my sight that loved me unconditionally, and filled my heart with adoration, courage, and the reassurance that I mattered and would be okay.

Years later, I am still healing my relationship with death. I now recognize it within African cosmological perspective. Life and death are cyclical, two parts of the same existence. It is the same way that the seasons change.

The physical world and the spiritual, the seen and the unseen, work in tandem. Energy is transmitted between these planes. By using the elements of this physical plane, like fire and water, we can connect with our spirits and Ancestors. Consciousness is also a form of energy, and where our awareness and intention lies quite literally dictates reality. This is how manifestation and spells work. Western science often disregards indigenous knowledge frameworks, just to later come to the same conclusions that our ancestors knew for centuries. A good example of this is herbal healing and traditional medicinal techniques. When you look at quantum physics, black holes, things incredibly large or tiny in scale, which are at the limits of our physical observation, measurement, and comprehension — this is where I believe Spirit lies.

Mario Montilus ( Haitian, 1961-)

I love truth and I love Black people. Black women, Black queer people, Black trans people, Black children, Black parents, Black aunts, Black uncles, Big Mommas, Big Papas, Brothas and Sistas, and so on.

I want this to be a record that explicitly venerates Pan-African Spacetime and its infinite forms! Thank you for coming on the journey with me.